I have not been listening to you. I finally hear you. I realize that I have to let you go to keep you. I realize that I can't let you leave here relieved to be away from me. I want you to see me grow, be strong and begin to re-create myself. I can't keep on beating up your heart. I want this time before you leave to help us transition into the next phase of our lives. I want to speak to you, see you before you go. I will miss you terribly. But when you are gone. I want you to remember our last days as special. I want you to remember that I started to change. I want you to see how strong I am. When you are off in India. I want you to wonder what I am up to and not worry about me. I want you to yearn for me and not pity me. I will live my life while you are gone. I will become happy. I will become strong. I will change the things I am not happy with myself. I will grow into myself. I am finally listening, my dear sweet Kamikaze baby.
It is the only way I will learn. We will learn.
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