As I watch the waves crash.

Life always takes a different turn when you pounder it seaside. Life seems so simple and somehow hopeful. There has always been something about the ocean. Or perhaps the y-ocean as my nephews calls it. I always feel at peace here. I am trying to soak in as much sea air as I can. It calms me. My soul rests. I feel it in my soul. I can not continue to live my life and blame someone else. It is time for me to be me. To face all my fears and become the person I was always meant to be. 

I need the sea salt to sink in and create the most beautiful metemprphisis I have ever seen. I am tired of simply existing. I want to live. 

McDonald's ya think!

Seriously. I have had some haters post comments. I'm all for free speach but comments that are not written in proper English or come from a person who has possibly never experience love and then pass judgement on me. This is my life. This is my way of processing all the shit that I am going through. I am choosing a public outlit I get that but telling me I love McDonald's and are chunky monkey is classless.  You possibly never ever had a heart. 

I have to explain nothing to anyone. 

Should or shouldn't I?

You always prided us on being honest with each other. Being able to bear our souls to each other. You have a wife. It kills me to say and I need not say why. You know why. It makes you the biggest hypocrite alive. 

You should have told me. I'm absolutely finished with the idea that we could ever be "so called best Friends". Thank you for making a fool out of me. I thought you respected me and our years together. A heads up before the world and FB would have been the least you could have done. 

All I ever asked from a dear friend was to know that I meant the world to the person I was with and my years did not mean nothing. You ignored me.  

Robert honestly you have to stop thinking of yourself. Two people were in the relationship. One needs to be set free. Stop thinking of yourself. Let me go in the beauty that I deserve. 

Anyone ones thought at this point would be much needed.